If you have been here a while, then you have undoubtedly witnessed my struggle of walking through valleys and still trying to cling to God’s faithfulness. There were so many times where I felt tired from the wrestling, and I chose to stay and pout in the valley.
“This is too hard. When is it going to end, God?”
“Why us? Are you not hearing our prayers, God?”
“Would you just show up and defend us already? Enough is enough.”
These were common things that I would cry out to God. Maybe you can relate.
But do you know what I recently realized? I have been playing victim for far too long, and that ends today. I am getting my fight back.
I could write a book full of crazy stories of things that my husband and I have walked through. Man, we have gotten knocked out so many times, and then we always get back up and try to keep fighting. BUT. Now here is the big but…I thought that by getting back up that meant that we were being resilient. But I realized that every time we got back up, we just felt more worn and angry. We were not in control of our emotions. Instead, we were hanging on to the frustration or hurt of the things that had happened to us. We were falling into self pity and almost expecting bad things to happen.
I have been praying that the Lord would renew our minds. That He would knock out that spirit of fear and timidity and give us power, love, and sound minds. I have also been praying that God would work on our hearts and that we would stop looking at things with our earthly eyes but rather with a spiritual lens. When we look at our circumstances with our earthly eyes, we fall right into the enemy’s trap of feeling defeated and stuck in a cycle of poor me. But when we look at things from an eternal perspective, we recognize that every thing that happens and every piece of our story will be used for His glory.
Now I am telling you guys, God has been answering my prayers because the way I process things has changed, and my heart and perspective have dramatically flip a switch.
I am getting my fight back. I am no longer playing the poor me card or anticipating the worst to happen. I am not going to sit and sulk in things of the past, but rather step up to the plate and declare victory over whatever is about to come. We cannot claim victory in Christ if we are stuck in a victim mentality. We cannot step into all that Jesus has for us when we are hanging onto the baggage of things that He desires to free us from.
So I will no longer walk around with my head low and moping over the hard that we have walked through. I will choose to let harsh words roll off my shoulders and not allow them to brew in my heart where bitterness threatens to grip me. I will seek to find joy and declare that we are more than conquerors in Christ Jesus even when my human brain does not understand. I will do everything for Jesus and not for man. I will keep growing in Scripture and learning that the Word of God is my sword and the breastplate of righteousness is my shield. I will stand back up with grit after being knocked down because God has renewed my mind and transformed my heart.
This is how I am getting my fight back. Because of Jesus’ work in me. And my desire is that others can get their fight back too. That we will not fall into a cycle of feeling defeated but rather step up knowing that we are whole and complete in Christ no matter what happens. Let’s get our fight back people.
Journey to Dominican 